Tuesday, February 19, 2013

OpenLinkNight: Innocents

Fear (the only lonely friend)
pretends (as anxiety ends)
the spool will still unravel
leaving only empty spaces.

Racing to reel thread in again
won't make gaps invisible
or lost found
or wrong right.

World grinds down to dust
the collective ambitions of all
who've chanted hopes to an
empty room,
who've waited (with fidgeting digits)
for response from nameless,
faceless crowds of anonymous naysayers
chewing bits of innocent flesh for fun,
just because.

Split hairs seem silly in the fray of
loss,
in the wake of mourning
possibilities bottled like a ship
sitting empty in smoky glass
or a fish-less bowl --
blue stones strewn about for effect.

Yet,

syllables spill, pour,
gush furious across pages
already covered in layered
opinions,
emotions,
whispered devotions . . .

Even prayers and promises
feel impotent
scattered across the night of a darkened soul.

*Linking up with dVerse. It's a wonderful community where all are welcome to share. Feel free to join us. 

35 comments:

  1. This is gorgeous. Deep and full of emotion.

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  2. Love the pace. The line breaks really pushed me through the poem and added to the emotion

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    1. Thank you, Jessica. My maiden name is Lang :)

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  3. "the collective ambitions of all
    who've chanted hopes to an
    empty room,"

    Fantastic! ...as always, Lori.

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    1. Good to see you, Joel. Glad you linked up tonight :)

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  4. Great piece, Lori, but I need to take a happy pill now!

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    1. Lol, sorry to bum you out. Now, go find a happy poem, my friend!

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  5. nice piece lori...lots of emotion in this one...the chanting hopes to an empty room really jumped out at me...and the closure def sucked the air out the room a bit...smiles.

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    1. Sorry to put a damper on the happy thoughts in the pub, but at least you were still able to leave here with your signature smiles, right?

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  6. In this poem I read loneliness and fear, but I also read syllables pouring on pages....and in one's writing and sharing one is never alone! And all of our pages are somehow connected across the miles. Really, I liked this poem. I think it expressed something many of us feel at one time or another.

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    1. Yes, Mary, writing is definitely where I can express everything, even the emotions that sometimes scare me. Thanks for reading :)

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  7. :(

    I was depending on you to cheer me up Lori!!!

    :D

    some deep, dark investigations going on:
    for me, this line really leaped

    Split hairs seem silly in the fray of
    loss,

    this is a great line and so true
    although after a while the loss
    makes thick rope of the severed end . . .

    uh oh! we both need to go listen to
    some show tunes and have a boogie to
    flip the blues . . .

    Split hairs seem silly in the fray of
    loss,

    :)

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    1. Lol, despite your poetry, I always picture you a happy one :) But, yes, some peppy tunes couldn't hurt either of us for sure!

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  8. Full of anxiety and a sense of near-helplessness, succumbed to outside forces. Enjoyed this! Many lines remind me of my recent poem, "On Fear".

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    1. Thanks for visiting, Matthew, for pointing me in the direction of your poem, "On Fear" - Enjoyed it :)

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  9. possibilities bottled like a ship
    sitting empty in smoky glass
    or a fish-less bowl -- love the imagery and felt emotions in this lori

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  10. excellent write, especially the 3rd and 4th stanza, outstanding verse. Thanks

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  11. There's some very intense emotion being expressed in this well crafted poem, Lori. I need a rest after reading it, which is how I respond after fear has gone too.

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    1. I hear you on needing a rest after the fear is gone. I'm hoping it's gone for good :)

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  12. I so enjoyed this, Lori... especially:

    possibilities bottled like a ship
    sitting empty in smoky glass

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  13. Am I fashionably late to the party? lol I really love this poem. The 3rd stanza is my favorite. Your emotional imagery was elegant while dripping with dark reality. I really enjoyed seeing the "dark side of Lori" as well! :)

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    1. Better late than never, right? And thanks for the comment, Mr. Freemont :)

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  14. I like the night of the darkened soul ~ These lines are specially sharp:

    possibilities bottled like a ship
    sitting empty in smoky glass
    or a fish-less bowl --
    blue stones strewn about for effect.

    Good to see you Lori ~

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  15. Great imagery and a gorgeous write. Good to see you again Lori.

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  16. Best part?

    opinions, emotions, whispered devotions.

    I like how the last part seemed to be pushing us towards the end...faster than the rest of the poem. When you talked of syllables spilling, I actually felt as if they were spilling, quickly.

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